Walking the Talk: A Parent’s Guide to Intimacy and Healthy Relationships is LIVE on Amazon

release day for Walking theTalk

The day has finally arrived! Walking the Talk is LIVE on Amazon. YIKES!

I cannot begin to tell you how honored I am that I have this opportunity to share the truths God has placed on my heart for parents. Regardless of where you are on the parenthood journey, please know you are not alone! Heartskeeper is a community that wants to walk along side you on your journey- experiencing the good, the bad and the ugly. It’s not just about this book, but the chance to find family, fellowship and be a part of a community of truth seekers.

Over the next few weeks, I will start sharing some awesome things happening around the book release. 2016 looks really busy for me but I am honored and humbled that I can use my experience to speak on such an awesome platform! And let us not forget the holidays coming up! Lots of announcements!!!!!!

But for now, do a happy dance with me as we celebrate my RELEASE DAY for Walking the Talk: A Parent’s Guide to Intimacy and Healthy Relationships.


Conflict: How to Successfully Navigate Rocky Terrain

conflict blog post ephesians 4:32

We have all been there. Sometimes we are the offender while other times we are the offended. It is a hard place to be and often, when the emotions subside, we realize the issue could have been handled with so much more maturity and respect.

I can recall a heated argument with someone I considered as a dear friend. The pain of her words still hurt when I think about how quickly she dismissed me and our friendship. To this day, I have no idea what caused such a rapid decline in our relationship but I learned some valuable lessons.

None of us will ever be perfect and there will be more times than we care to admit that we could have handled a conflict differently. After the fact, what can we do to minimize the effects of a conflict in our marriages,friendships and even professional relationships?

  1. Don’t dwell on it

Regardless of who was right or wrong, let it go. I am the world’s worst at obsessing over what I should have said or should have done. Regardless, the conflict is over and we need to learn to move on.

Learn what you can from the experience, accept what happened and focus on making the relationships in your life better by moving towards your future, not dwelling in your past.

2. Don’t become a martyr

Maybe you held your tongue with your spouse or a disrespectful friend. Good for you but don’t pat yourself on the back too much. Taking a higher road does not make you the “better person.” Taking the higher road makes you an adult. We should not self gloat in our own self-righteousness.

No one wins when someone gets offended. We all lose something. Sometimes, the loss is a relationship, respect and/or community.

3. Don’t take sides

Again, there is not a winner when there is a quarrel. Often times, however, there is an unfair line drawn in the sand by each opposing party. We should not expect others in our lives to choose who they will defend. Our children should never be thrown in our battles to buffer nor should our family and friends. If it is not their battle to fight, leave them out of the conflict.

Having people take your side in an argument to prove you were right only shows how insecure and petty you are being about the issue.

4. Don’t take it to social media

You can get on your pick of social media sites and someones entire life is posted for your viewing pleasure.  If an argument with your friend or spouse was that heated, take a day or so off before posting. You might regret what you type later. You might be able to erase it, but if they read it, it will always be there in their head.

Your conflict is not news worthy. Stop posting your every issue.

5.  Don’t take it as a bad thing

Many times when conflict between people takes place, we automatically think everyone and everything is against us. When strife happens, take it as an opportunity to learn. Take the chance to learn how to better manage conflict and yourself. We must be open to learning from the experience.

Often times, there is truth somewhere in the midst of conflict.

Conflict can grow your relationships or it can destroy them. Much of what happens is up to us. It takes spiritual maturity to handle issues properly and more often times than not, it requires us to consider another’s self-interest over our own agendas. We have to be intentional in how we approach, how we respond and most importantly, how we love one another- even in conflict.

pre-order sale

Come Join the Social Media Family

facebook icon

Good Morning Heartskeeper Family! So many great things are happening and I find myself behind on keeping everyone up to date with the new book and articles out right now. I tend to lean towards Facebook and Twitter to post the day-to-day stuff and I have noticed some of you are not connected on these sites. If that is not your thing, it’s okay! I need to post more on the blog- YOU are very important.

But if you like to see more book excerpts, I encourage you to head over to Twitter or Facebook! If not, be prepared for several emails in your inbox to catch you up. So I apologize in advance!!!  Here’s one for your viewing right now……


Walking the Talk book blurb

Happy reading!


Cover Reveal for Walking the Talk Is Here!!!


Walking the Talk Book Image

ABOUT Walking the Talk: A Parent’s Guide on Intimacy and Healthy Relationships

Every parent wonders if they are doing the right thing with their children. Having the “talk” is no different.

Where do you start? What do you say?

Maybe it’s not so much about our “talk” but our “walk”……

In this Christian parenting guide, Walking the Talk debunks the myth that the conversation on faith, relationships, and intimacy only focuses on our children. Whatever the age of your children, you will walk away equipped to tackle topics on body image, puberty, relationships and faith – all while being encouraged and challenged to look at your own personal relationships, faith, and views on intimacy.

Through humor and transparent dialogue, Walking the Talk reminds parents how important their role, lived out by example, can be in guiding their children in making healthy choices. Thought provoking and engaging, this book will prepare and expand your understanding of the pivotal role you play in the lives of your children.

After all, your example lived out speaks louder to your child than any words you could ever say.

pre-order sale

Calling for Team Members

book street team

My book will be coming out for pre-order on Monday, October 5, 2015 (ecopy only). Not only will it go up for pre-order but all the hard work on the cover will also be revealed on Monday! Can I say I am nervous but cannot wait to share this book with you? I can officially marked “write a book” off my bucket list.

Honestly, in the end, I am simply praying that God can be exalted through my book and parents find confidence in their parenting journey. We have kept a lot of the details pertaining to the book quiet until now!

Over the next few weeks, we will begin sharing excerpts of the book and letting readers know how they can get a copy of Walking the Talk: A Parent’s Guide to Intimacy and Healthy Relationships. If you want to know how the REAL birds and bees talk actually goes, this is the book for you and your friends.

Maybe you don’t have kids and think “I don’t need this book.” You might be surprised. The book isn’t just for parents with teens. The book engages all couples, in all stages of the parenting journey. If you don’t yet have children, you are getting an early start! After all, the point of the guide is to show couples/parents in order to talk about healthy relationships and intimacy, we must first emulate what that looks like.

But how will we get the book into the hands of parent’s everywhere? This is where you come in!

I am looking for 20 people to be on my street team. For those that participate, they will receive a FREE ecopy of my book when it comes out in November. The first 5 that review it from my street team will  receive a gift for taking the time to review.

Interested? Here’s what I need you to do.

  • Use your social media pages (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc.) to tell your family and friends about the book. Don’t worry, you aren’t having to write your own posts. Simply share and tag updates I post on Heartskeeper to your social media homepages. Now is a good time to go like the page if we aren’t already friends!
  • Be excited about the book and encourage your friends to come along the journey.
  • Post regularly (but don’t be obnoxious!) Posting might not always be about the book either. Go read a few articles I have written and share. Then, go share them with family and friends!
  • Help me expand my reader community not be selling my book but connecting me with your community of believers. I want to be friends and I want to stand in the gap for YOU!

You are already on social media everyday so why not? What are you losing?!  We all know someone who needs some encouragement. We reach more together than we ever will alone. Will you help make this book launch epic?

You can email me at writelife13@gmail.com,  post here in the comments section OR comment on social media. I need you to let me know if you are on the team; otherwise I might not realize all your hard work. I want to make sure I get you my book as a little thank you!

Remember, I am only taking 20 team members. I hope you decide to join me!


The Importance of Failure

It was one of those weeks. If life would have handed me a do-over I would have signed my name rejectedon the dotted line. Yet again, I found myself in a place of disappointment, questioning my writing pursuit and faced with the decision to quit or continue.

People say bad news travels in three’s and I must agree. Within a 72 hour period, I received three rejection letters from various publishers. At one point, I powered down my phone in fear another email alert would sound, bringing with it one more rejection.

I thought seriously of smashing my computer into tiny shards of plastic, burning my journals and banning all writing utensils from the home…..okay, maybe a little dramatic but I am making a point.

I had all the failure I could withstand for one day.

I started asking myself what was the point in pursuing a writing career? I receive more rejection letters than I do acceptances– a generic response that thanks me for my submission yet always ends with the statement “but at this time, we cannot use your article.”

Rejection is hard but I hope to shed light on the importance of following your passion regardless of how difficult it might be. No matter how many times you have fallen flat on your face, there is a silver lining to failure and we need to remember it:

Failure is necessary.

Failure reminds. Failure humbles. Failure refocuses.

Failure makes you remember what you are passionate about. Even though I want to quit fairly often, I don’t because I love it. I love sharing my thoughts and knowing that maybe one person might be inspired, encouraged and equipped to make that marriage better, reconnect with their families, or renew their relationship with God. Failure reminds me I am not doing this just for me, but something much greater than me.

Success is a great feeling but it is fleeting. One day you are on top of the mountain and the next day, you are in the valley. Writing has been a roller coaster ride for me. There was a time when I first started freelancing that I thought I had it all together. Magazines were seeking me out and I was up for a staff writer position. If I am honest, I thought I had it in the bag. I was young and had fresh ideas. I was bringing in new readers. My editor thought I would be a great fit. Yet, somehow, the magazine did not hire me. It was a blow to my ego. I was devastated and humbled. If the only thing any of us ever experienced was success, we would become complacent, entitled and woefully self-confident. Failure puts you in your place and reminds you that you are not in control. God’s plan is ultimate and it does not always work out the way we have planned. Failure reminded me to keep my eyes trained on the One that held my future.

Failure, if allowed, will help you refocus on the calling placed in your life. I worked with youth and college for years. When I started blogging and freelancing, I focused only on young adults. I thought that my own personal mishaps in my teen years would help other teens overcome their personal struggles. I tried for years to write toward that audience with very little success. After much prayer and lots of failed attempts, I wrote an article for parents. The response was unbelievable. I learned through a lot of trial and error who my target audience was and it was not who I originally thought. I had a call to help parents reconnect with their teens. Sometimes, we get so caught up in what we think we are to do that we forget to ask God what He wants for us. My failures, both personally and professionally, have reshaped how I approach ideas. My focus is on how God can use me, not how I think I can be used.

Failure is not a bad thing. We all need to be reminded that our purpose is not for our gain but His. We all need to be humbled to the life He has called us to and sometimes you have to fall before you can climb. And it is when we are focused on our true calling that we will see God’s hand at work. Three years ago, I submitted a manuscript written for teens on sexual purity. It was rejected needless to say. This year, I took that idea and recrafted the content, focusing on parents and their role in the message of purity. I then resubmitted my manuscript to a new publisher and I am now navigating my first book deal through Vox Dei.

Failure pushes you. It keeps you hungry. You cannot fully appreciate your successes until you have fully experienced your letdowns.

Next time, when you fall short of your desired goal, do not allow yourself to succumb to doubt and fear. Instead, look at the set back as a set up for something much greater than you could have ever originally thought.

“Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure… than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.”

Theodore Roosevelt




Marriage Series: The Art of War

“For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our battlefieldwarfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses.”

2 Corinthians 10:3-4


The warfare can be anything or anyone. Today, I am talking about the complacency infiltrating our marriages, slowly destroying the precious union that held so much promise at one time. Now, the flesh will whisper sweet lies, helping us justify the defilement of our marriage covenant.

“She’s not the same woman I married.”

“We simply fell out of love with one another.”

“He’s impossible to deal with.”

“I deserve happiness and someone who loves me.”

We live in a society that condones every feeling we ever have. When something gets tough, we walk away from it. We justify feelings and dismiss our marriage covenant as some expired contract. Our commitments mean absolutely nothing.

If something doesn’t make us happy, we wave our white flag and passively watch our marriages die in the wreckage of a war in which we are solely responsible.

And a short time later, we are at the battlefield again. Same war just a different enemy (relationship). Are you tired yet? Don’t you want to know what a marriage that is honoring could be like?

I cannot speak for what is happening in your marriage. It may not be the ideal situation for you but I want to encourage you to do one thing.


Fight until every fiber of your being is exhausted.

Fight as if your very next breath depends on it.

Fight for your spouse even when they won’t.

Fight for your marriage.

War is messy. There are casualties in war but couples you do not have to be one of them. In the battle for our marriage, it might not be physical death, but sometimes it means we put to death the assumptions, the entitlements, the selfishness and the lies we have allowed ourselves to believe.

Here are four verses I encourage you to read and consider. Weigh your marriage against these verses. Are you doing this? If not, have you considered trying another way to fight to keep your marriage alive and protected from war?

 “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”- 1 Peter 4:8

Marriage is a union of two sinners. No one is perfect in a marriage. There will be times that a husband or wife may fail each other, mess up, or do something hurtful. It is important to remember God’s definition of love and know that loving each other deeply can cover all those sins. Fight with love.

“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” – Ecclesiastes 4:12

Do you understand you are stronger together, not separate? The three cords in this verse represent a husband, a wife, and God. These three form a close relationship that is not easily broken. Many of us never put God in our marriage equation. My question is this- how’s that working for you? Fight with God, not against Him in your marriage.

“Be completely humble and gentle; Be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the spirit through the bond of peace.”- Ephesians 4:2-3

This verse goes against the lies of this world. Individuals are told that if they feel wronged, respond however they feel justified. Fighting with anger will not soothe the issues. Responding in spite and annoyance will only hinder progress.  My guess is this is why you are where you are in the first place? Don’t fight with your words.

“Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”- Mark 10:9

When you first enter into marriage, the last thing you are thinking about is divorce! Over the years, you enter times of hardship and trials that threaten your relationship. Even in seasons of drought, divorce should never be uttered. You have been joined together under God, don’t let anyone or anything be an excuse to break your marriage vows. Fight for the hope that God can change something broken into something beautiful. It is not too late……

More in the Marriage Series. Stay tuned!


A Marriage Series, Part One

Today, my husband and I have been married twelve years. In the span of these twelve years, we wedding ringshave moved more times than I can actually keep track, created two beautiful children, made drastic job changes and just yesterday, purchased a home.

In the past twelve years, I will admit we have fought passionately but only to make up with that same amount of passion. We have said things that we instantly regretted (okay, more me than him. I had a temper at one time). We have grown apart out of selfishness and entitlement, only to realize we are stronger together.

Slowly, we have learned to fight for one another, not against.

Anyone that tells you that marriage life is easy is lying or highly delusional. In fact, I wish someone had set me down and explained just how difficult marriage actually is.

Marriage has been one of the hardest things I have ever committed to in my life.

A few weeks ago, I had a blogger out of Miami contact me for an interview. She wanted to know my thoughts on marriage and how we have made things work in ours. I have no idea what happened to that interview. I am afraid we might have frightened her off. For those that know me, you know I don’t hide my thoughts on anything! I was as real with her as I will be in my upcoming blog series.

Maybe it is just a season, but I know people who are rather getting married soon or considering divorce. I am elated for my friends taking the plunge and I pray for them daily and for God’s hand on their marriage. On the other hand, I am saddened to see so many marriages dissolving and the issues couples are facing.

This particular blog series was placed on my heart several weeks back and I could not think of a better time than on my anniversary to start it. I don’t know how long it will be or what it will involve. My prayer is that you- single, married or divorced– can get something from it.

I also encourage you to make comments and share your own story. Let me know if you want to share about your marriage. Until then, happy reading and stay tuned to Heartskeeper!

Happy anniversary baby! I love you!